day 1 over

Today I found myself wonderinga about my past. Sometimes we look back at the decisions and actions and we hang our head in shame. I know that I didn't always make the best decisions and some of those decisions caused me a great deal of heartache. On the flip side of that I know that because of what I went through I have a better understanding of just what kind of strength I had, And that through all of my triumphs and failures God stood by patiently waiting for me. I know these next few months are going to be hard that they are going to test my faith in both God and myself and all I can do is pray to God for guidance. I lost my self a long time ago I let my faith and my hope and dreams fall by the wayside in pursuit of what felt "nice" at the moment. And now I look around  and there is  no one. I only have myself to blame for the state my life is in and rather then sit here and feel sorry for myself for all the stupid things I've done I shall lean on God's promise that he will give rest to the weary that he will carry me when I cannot walk that whatever is old he will make new again. I think that we forget that at times. We are not the first to fall short the glory of God and we are not the only ones that do. For ALL have sinned and fallen short the glory of God. It is what we do after we realize this is what makes the difference. What good is surrendering something at the alter only to make it to the door just to turn around and pick up what we left. It's time to give things up for good. Sometimes it really does require sacrifice. To burn away the bad to get to the heart of what is good.